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Posts tagged ‘Lindsay Lohan’

3
Nov

Dating Profile Headline of the Day: Magic

Well, if Justin Bieber can have a child out of wedlock the world really is going to hell in a hand-basket (my admiration of Lindsay Lohan notwithstanding).

What you roll out of bed for in the morning is to put your best foot forward and make a positive impact on the lives of the people you interact with during the day.

No one gets up in the morning planning to have a crappy day, right?

Today is your day and it all starts with using this as your dating profile headline:
“If you believe in love share with me some of your magic.”

Have a great day!

25
Feb

Friday’s Top Conversation Topics

The week is coming to the end (hence: weekend) and it’s going to be time to do with your free time as you will. Likely this will involve other people (or meet someone now, here) and you’ll need things to talk about. Have no fear, Friday’s Top Conversation Topics is here. Read the stories and my witty remarks and you’ll be well prepared to maintain any conversational grouping.

- Pizza diet saves woman’s life. Yes, she fell down and couldn’t get up. What saved her? The woman had ordered a pizza every day for three years and when the delivery person hadn’t delivered a pizza in three days became concverned, visited the house and… well you can read the rest. No word on the weight of the woman involved or what her favorite toppings were. But I’m sure she gave a decent tip.

- Surprise: the TV show “Two and a Half Men” has had production halted after Charlie Sheen goes on radio rampage. Not really a surprise, Charlie Sheen just happens to be this year’s train wreck. Lindsay Lohan is still a close second.

- Breast milk ice cream. Only one question needs to be answered: “What could be more natural than fresh, free-range mother’s milk in an ice cream?” The flavor is called Baby Gaga.

- Swedes declare ad of man on sheepskin rug, wearing only boxer shorts, as offensive to men. “The ad, which shows the computer-generated image of Robert lying seductively on sheep skins clad only in cotton boxer shorts with an outline of his oversized sex organ clearly defined, was reported to the ombudsman by a individual.” Not me though, I do have an oversized sex organ…

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24
Sep

Friday’s Conversation Topics

It’s the end of the week, for all the Monday-to-Friday people out there, and they need help.

I offer the help they need, mainly in the form of news stories from the previous week that make for great conversation topics. There’s never a fear of talking to a stranger when you have something interesting to say, so read on, McDuff, and learn to spin a tale all will want to hear!

- Stuxnet makes Iran a target. It’s about time someone did something, am I right?

- Mad as Hell was yesterday. People everywhere up in arms over the hidden fee agenda that airlines have to pick our pockets while we check in or arrive at the gate. Were you part of the protest?

- Fake Tide grabbed at the gate. Customs agents find laundry detergent from China falsely labeled and clean up this ring of crime.

- Lindsay Lohan not passing “Go” and headed straight back to jail. Did anyone actually lose money on this bet?

- Spray-on clothes revealed on catwalk. Who said models need to actually wear anything anymore?

23
Jul

Friday’s Conversation Topics

It’s Friday again and time for the weekly round-up of great conversational news stories from the last 7 days, or so. (I add the “or so” because not every story has a published and verified date.)

Read my comments, read the story and try to remember the essential points of the story so you have something to talk about later and be able to avoid those otherwise embarrassing pregnant pauses in what could otherwise be a happy pairing up or group conversation. Good luck!

- Beaver shot in suspected payback killing. I had to include this simply because of the headline. Who shoots beavers and why? Was there porn involved or was it a PG-13 shooting? Sorry, I just couldn’t resist but you still have to read the story.

- Stone Henge meet Wood Henge. While it isn’t out of this world that archeologists looking for something found something, I think that except for nice bed time reading, all of this nonsense shouldn’t be funded by public dollars. It’s just my opinion mind you.

- Mug shots of famous people as they headed off to jail. Lindsay Lohan, you’re in “good” company. LOL. I think whoever has 12 days in the pool for betting on how long she’s actually in jail has the best shot at winning!

- Romantic movies ruin real life for many, Australian survey finds. Geesh, they could have asked me and I would have saved them a ton of money. Doesn’t anyone else realize how many kids these days mistake “music entertainment” for real life? If you disagree with me all I have to say to you is “Pull up your pants, your boxers are showing!

- The truth about lying. I do not care to admit agreement or disagreement with the phrase “You save your really big lies,” Bella DePaulo, Ph.D. says, “for the person that you’re closest to.”

Have a great week!

21
Jul

Dating Profile Headline of the Day

But sharing is a lifestyle!

Wednesday

As I write my great personal headline example for you today I realize that in some places it might just start being tomorrow at this time.

So does this make today’s headline suggestion yesterday’s news already?

Don’t deep thoughts sometimes give you a headache? if only life was easier, like if you were a famous movie and TV star from an early age, like the age of 10.

I wish I had a famous lifestyle…

Well, maybe just the money that fame brings instead…

That being said I do have hope for your future, and mine. Prosperous is only the first step, right?

My headline suggestion for you today is simple, but thoughtful, I think:
“I will share with you a new life”.

Have a great day!

16
Jul

Friday’s News Conversational Stories

Another weekend is upon us, another weekend of meeting people, of dates, of conversations.

Here are my best newsworthy picks of conversational-worthy stories from the past week that you should know be well read of so you can discuss these stories confidently and intelligently.

- Lindsay Lohan enters a rehab facility for drunks, voluntarily, in hopes of not going to jail. Can you repeat after me “A little too late.” I really feel for this poor soul. Fame at an early age and all the temptations that exists has not made life easy, without a doubt. Lindsay, here’s a music video for you, a little inspirational help for the next 90 days or so:



- Do you “Sext” the wrong person by accident? Don’t worry, there’s plenty of others that do the same thing, a recent British poll finds. For me I don’t click “send” without double checking the numbers. Luckily…

- Goldman Sachs pays hefty $550 million fine for… whatever… Does anyone else wonder where all that money to pay the fine came from? Only on Wall Street does paying a fine in the millions add value to the company’s balance sheet and explain away all the wrong doing. Do you know anyone that’s lost their job, house, or retirement lately? What a comfort the SEC has brought us… ugh…

- Apple’s iPhone 4 fix… What will they offer the millions affected with poor signal quality? Stay tuned. CNET will host a live blog about the Apple announcement.

Have a great Friday and a great weekend!

8
Jul

Dating Profile Headline of the Day

His name is Rob

Thursday

I think we all take some secret joy in the follies of the wealthy and young stars.

Seriously… if you make so much money, need to present such a glaringly white persona (and haven’t yet learned the lessons of Tiger Woods) discretion is the better part of stardom. Rent a limo for the night. You’ve earned it, don’t drive and drink all you want. There’s enough chaos in the world and we need more stars that do shine whine, shine true.

Give us hope, right?

That being said, we can’t ever slam the bad ones enough, can we?

So post this as your headline today, get a laugh and a reply to your profile with:
“I never went to rehab - with or without Lindsay Lohan.”

Have a great day!

7
Jul

Lindsay Lohan’s Creative Manicure

Fuck U Fingernail

Fuck U Fingernail

Lindsay Lohan really had all her hopes on her personality making the judge not send her to jail.

Oops!

I don’t think anyone knows if the judge had a pair of binoculars and saw this on her nail, but Lindsay get’s justice for her absence from drunk driving school.

See you in 90 days Lindsay (although my money is still on that she spends less than 3 complete days in jail).

More:
- Village Voice
- Harold Sun
- The Insider
- Stylelist
- People

6
Jul

90 Days for Lindsay Lohan

Actress Lindsay Lohan sobs as judge orders her to serve 90 days in jail for missing alcohol counseling sessions.
More news links to follow:
- Foxnews.com
- CNN.com

15
Apr

Lindsay Lohan’s eHarmony Profile

The perfect match for Lindsay Lohan is???
Watch her eharmony video and find out!


This is a parody, right?