No one wants to end a relationship prematurely. On the other hand, no one wants to stay in a bad relationship and deal with all the pain and frustration longer than they need to. It’s easier to figure out how do you know when to stop making up and break up rather than waste valuable time and energy staying when it is obvious it’s not working.

But, at what point do you get there? When have you gotten to the point of how do you know when to stop making up and break up? The truth is that there are no easy answers. There is no cut and dried answer, it’s more about each person figuring out for themselves when they’ve reached that point.

Like I said, there is no one answer that fits everyone, but I’ve compiled a list of some of the things you can look at and consider that may help you figure it out in your own relationship:

1. One of the easiest things you can do, yet still pretty effective, is to stop and honestly ask yourself if your relationship brings you more joy or more pain. If you work too hard and you get very little out of your relationship, it may well be time to call it quits.

If, on the other hand, you and your partner have relatively few bad times and a lot of good times, and you are both willing to work on those trouble issues, your relationship may well be worth saving.

2. Which brings me to point number 2; are both of you willing to admit to and address those issues in your relationship in a true, mature manner? Even if the issues you face are minor, it can still cause unnecessary stress and strife. For that reason, you want to be able to fix those issues, but you can’t do it all on your own.

You both have to be mature enough to face up to your own shortfalls as well as fix those things. If you are too immature to face up to your own issues and try to make changes than that may be where you should start.

It’s pretty easy to identify where your partner is lacking, but it is considerably more difficult to face your own shortcomings and that is where a big dose of maturity will come in handy.

3. And one last point I want to make is this: don’t mistake fighting with “passion” and convince yourself that your relationship is really good and that the two of you are just passionate people.

Passion may be a good thing but it isn’t always what it is cracked up to be. Sometimes it is just immaturity and a lack of being able to communicate. Make sure you know and recognize the difference between the two.

That breaking up and making up may seem fun and exciting now, but when you have a full time job, a few kids and financial commitments it gets really old really quickly.
So, how do you know when to stop making up and break up? Hopefully, these tips will help you figure it out more quickly and with less pain.

This topic and more is discussed in the Magic of Making Up ebook. Learn the right and wrong things to do to get your ex back here