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Dr. Dennis Neder: First Date Checklist

DR. DENNIS NEDER AND KYLIEFirst dates sometimes offer a range of emotion from thrilling to terrifying! Here are some tips that will help things go smoothly:

#1: Be on time! Timeliness is expected, but being late (or too early) makes a bad impression. If you can't help being a little late, call before the expected arrival time.

#2: (for men) Do a "personal check" before the date - are your fingernails clean, hair neat, clothes ironed, shoes polished, and any odors under control (including breath)? Women look at these things and are aware if they aren't in check. You should be too!

#3: (for women) Don't overdo the make-up or perfume! In most cases, a little goes a long way.

#4: Don't go to the movies, the theatre, or a concert on your first date - you want to be able to talk and get to know this person.

#5: Don't "pull out all the stops" - keep it simple. The first date is more of an interview than an event.

#6: (for men) Listen! Don't spend all your time talking about things you already know. Your goal here is to find out about your date.

#7: Have something to talk about - read a newspaper or magazine of general interest. Try to find common things you both share.

#8: Keep an open mind and don't argue. You don't have to agree with everything your date says, but where you differ, offer an alternative idea rather than discounting it, and if you don't know something ask!

#9: Remind yourself that your not nervous, you're just excited. Calm confidence is very appealing!

#10: Have fun! That's the idea of the first date.

Got a love, relationship or man/woman question? I answer all letters. You can write to me at for answers. For more information about my book, "Being a Man in a Woman's World", visit:  

Copyright © 2001-2009 Dr. Dennis W. Neder


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