This Article: How To Survive The Freeze-Out - And when it’s time to dump the man you thought you loved.
There are things worth than death when you’ve started dating a guy:
He doesn’t call for several days after your date;
He ignores your messages and plays it “cool”;
He intentionally misunderstands your viewpoint on any subject to create conflict;
He behaved great when you first started dating but now is reverting to his selfish old-style of life.
There are things that men should know about women, and on some level they do understand, but that can’t put their knowledge into practice.
Men understand that women are emotional people, while men think themselves the logical thinkers.
Putting one of each into a room and expecting wonderful results is a stretch at any time. More so when you’ve invested time to get to know each other and changes aren’t made to accommodate each other’s feelings, needs and desires for the future.
Often when a guy starts to fall in love, or even sense his increased desire for a woman, beyond the basic sexual instinct, he withdraws, becomes afraid and hides his true feelings under conflict and delayed dating tactics so he doesn’t have to confront and reveal his feelings, he can maintain his emotional detachment.
A woman when confronted by these bizarre (to her) ways of a man conveying his increased emotional attachment to her is often being “frozen out” of the changes in the relationships increased intimacy because of his tactics, his fear of understanding the emotional changes that are happening inside him.
At this point of the relationship giving a guy his “space” may be a great idea. But keep the “space” on a limited leash. You have to maintain contact, keep a regular schedule of talking, messaging and seeing each other. Don’t let him slip away because of his fears.
Don’t force him to talk about his feelings, they’ll come out if you give him time, talking to him about your “future” when the time is right, not in anger or as an ultimatum.
Some men will instinctively understand the natural changes and attachment to a woman as time and dating progresses. Nature will take its course, as it is.
Some women will make efforts to rush the relationship forward. Suggesting a timeline for commitment stages, engagement and marriage dates.
If your relationship is struggling because he is freezing you out of his emotions, this is not the time to suggest moving in together. This is not the time to become overly clingy and attached to his every move.
This emotional detachment your guy is suffering through is the ideal time to test him in ways that will allow him to reveal to himself his need for you, his desire and his love.
So, what are good ways to help him along?
Talk about couples that you both know that are on the same emotional level as each other. Discuss with him how they appear to others, how you think they feel towards each other. This comparison talk can open up his feelings of his need for you.
Take him to romantic movies, stories that you know reveal a man’s inner strength towards the woman he loves. Such storylines, although usually resisted by men in favor of action movies, can be instrumental in helping him along to understand how feelings are represented by a strong (and emotional) man towards the woman he loves.
Talk with him about the things he has done for you that really made a sparkle in your smile. Let him know that the type of behavior you appreciate most are things that he has done in the past and you’d like to see more in the future. But hint around, suggesting only how much you appreciated what he did, don’t make it a demand for future behaviors and actions.
When you are out together talk to him about how lonely people really look lonely. Make comparisons and pretend life stories for these lonely looking people and talk with him about these ideas of avoiding loneliness. How people can effect change in their life by finding the right partner.
If you’ve been unsuccessful at helping him emotionally along, if he’s only given you feedback for your efforts of conflict, of “I’m not in that place in my life yet” kind of talk, then it’s time to give him exactly what he says he wants: dump him.
You have caught the wrong type of man. Immature, emotionally inept and no desire for a monogamous relationship, cut the man free of your relationship and find someone that will treat you right.
Find the man that will be “The One”.
And to get to the
place of better understanding a man’s emotional potential, to be
able to better pick your dates, you’ve got to read “Catch Him & Keep
Him - A Woman’s Guide To Finding Mr. Right... And Keeping Him Hooked
You can preview the book and download it to your computer in just seconds!
You can check out all the details here
Thanks for reading and best of luck in life and love.
(c) 2007-2012 Catch Him Inc, Christian Carter, Robert Lee and Cheerful Attitude Web Design Ltd. All Rights Reserved. By accepting and reading this article you agree that: You understand this to be an opinion and not professional advice, it is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes, you are solely responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold Christian Carter harmless. Article may not be reprinted without express written consent.